How PSP Wants to be DS, and How it Never Will

Imagine this: you’re at school. It’s another normal day for a tech geek like you. You open your locker to grab your high-tech gear, when suddenly, you hear a clamor of excitement and awe.

You wonder where it’s coming from.  That’s when you see a group of people crowding around the popular kid. The popular kid looks at you and flips you the bird, causing the surrounding people to laugh. And as quickly as the kid came, he and his group are gone.

Now replace yourself with a Sony PlayStation Portable and the popular kid with a Nintendo DS Lite.

That’s the best way I can describe the current handheld war between DS and PSP.

DS is clearly the dominant handheld in terms of popularity. It doesn’t require rocket science to see. Not only does it appeal to the young and old, but hardcore gamers as well. True, PSP does offer more “adult” games, but when you have interesting, fun, and weird games on DS, its kind of hard NOT to look.

What does PSP offer that DS doesn’t? Well, it’s got online SOCOM, it’s got Exit, it’s got Lumines. It has GTA: LCS and VCS. And it has Metal Gear Solid: Portable Ops. But it also has a whole lot of PS2 ports. And when you only have one analog stick for a game that originally involved two, you end up with a crappy control scheme.

But these crappy games are (usually) not Sony’s fault. The games are the fault of the developers. The developers who want to make a quick buck by porting their somewhat-successful franchises to PSP. Developers think of PSP as what the title indicates: a portable PlayStation. Only they’re confused with the whole “numbers” thing, where PS2 is different than PS1. True, the tech in PSP is great, but it has constraints and limits to what it can perform. DS games are amazing because developers don’t NEED to focus on the graphics. They focus on what makes a game fun. With PSP, third-party developers focus on pretty graphics and processing, rather than fun.

Surprisingly, Sony realizes this. Yet, it seems Sony doesn’t believe they can create this mythical “fun” on their PSP.

For example, get a load of this:

Work Time Fun. Scientific name: the ”Wariowarecus-copycaticus” [Editor's Note: Hot Pixel is another one.]

WTF: Work Time Fun was essentially Sony’s attempt to get in on Nintendo’s “niche game” strategy. WarioWare: Touched was a smash hit on DS; it redefined “fun” by using random “microgames” that had you trying to compute different things in a short period of time. WTF tried to replicate that success for PSP, but ultimately failed to replicate the experience.

PQ: Practical Intelligence Quotient. Scientific name ”BrainAgeicus-wannabeus”

and coming soon

Hot Brain (no pic available). Scientific name “BigBrainAcademus-rippoffus”

What PQ tried to do was copy Brain Age, but turn it into an action-puzzle game. It was an inspired try, for sure, but as it turns out, trying to solve a ridonkulous block puzzle under a set period of time wasn’t very fun compared to Brain Age’s “short and sweet” math tests. (NOTE: WTF and PQ have the same publisher. At the time of writing, I had no idea. It is coincidence.)

Now, Hot Brain is another one of those ”created in a boardroom” games. “Brain Age was a success, so why not cash in with our OWN game?” No one can say whether the game will flop or not, since it’s coming later this year for PSP, but here’s the press release anyways. Make your own assumptions:

Fire up your mind with Hot Brain™, a game that engages the mind through a series of puzzles and challenges designed to raise the activity and temperature of your brain. Hot Brain presents challenging and fun mental activities that help ignite your mind in areas like logic, memory, math, language and concentration. Exclusive to the PSP® (PlayStation® Portable) system, the game allows you to test your skills in several single player modes or you can play with up to three people via ad-hoc connection. Whether you’re an expert or a beginner, a robust tutorial mode makes the game accessible and enjoyable to people of all ages. 

In 2007, Sony really needs to make a comeback with PSP. They need to come out with either A) a statement saying that they aren’t going to allow ports or B) a PSP2.

I’m sure Sony doesn’t want to meet Nintendo behind the school at 3 o’clock without some popularity behind them.

So, I ask you readers: What do you want out of the PlayStation Portable in 2007?

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